Mini 2228: Isekai uPick - Endgame

[Kate Bishop]

@Rhiannon

I like asking open-ended questions. Sometimes I get back answers that wouldn't come out of an assumption-laden question.

You've hit on two posts of that nature this morning, so I don't think you realize that's often my approach.

Hit on?

I have no agenda this morning besides trying not to cry in despair that Unwnd has decided that he's going to push me using the narrative that people are too scared to kill me and that the game is boring simply because people decided to sheep me, despite my efforts in cultivating and asking for opinions across the board.

It's unforgivable. I'm actually really upset. More than your egotism when I pushed you as being scum. More than Titus deciding to call me a bully for no good fucking reason.

Making this statement about me, that he just made, is extremely harmful as a stereotype and I'm being serious about the unforgivable part. I've reached the "I really hope I'm right about you being scum" level of upset, because if Unwnd is town and saying this?

I don't think he understands the harm that kind of statement does.

I don't fully understand the hurt, but I respect it.

I was referring to your question mark post and the post answering my question to unwnd are what I'm talking about. I don't mind clarifying what I'm up to, but I kinda like to get the data first. I feel like my playstyle and yours don't intersect super well, and this was an attempt to open up the brain case and hopefully we both get better at reading each other over time.

[unwnd]

I don't even know what I did

[unwnd]

If I tell you that my vote is not personal

Are you trying to insinuate that I'm secretly lying or something

[Lady Lambdadelta]

If I tell you that my vote is not personal

Are you trying to insinuate that I'm secretly lying or something

I'm telling you it doesn't matter what you meant to do, you made it personal with your comment and you don't get to decide at that point how I'm meant to feel or take it.

[unwnd]

Do you think I'm scum or not?

[Lady Lambdadelta]

Also, I'd like to say that voting me because the game is boring and people are sheeping me (and insinuating this is my fault somehow)

and because people are too afraid of me to vote me

are two DEEPLY PERSONAL REASONS.

[unwnd]

I literally said none of that

Quote me if I did lol

[Lady Lambdadelta]

Do you think I'm scum or not?

I don't give a shit right now, we're talking about something else. I'm putting the game aside right now to tell you that your behaviour in that post is not fucking okay.

[Lady Lambdadelta]

Friendship ended with

shitty gamestate perpetuated by Armchair LLD

Now DGB is my best friend.

I stake my entire life savings on LLD being scum. If I'm wrong, I'll shut up forever.

I'm pretty sure this table is too scared to eject her though, so I've been sitting here grumbling and being snarky because of it.

[Lady Lambdadelta]

Friendship ended with

shitty gamestate perpetuated by Armchair LLD

Now DGB is my best friend.

I stake my entire life savings on LLD being scum. If I'm wrong, I'll shut up forever.

I'm pretty sure this table is too scared to eject her though, so I've been sitting here grumbling and being snarky because of it.

[unwnd]

Nothing I said was unrelated to the game

May I be banned or striked down by God himself if I were lying

P-edit: That's a game read

[Lady Lambdadelta]

First quote, you say the shitty game state is perpetuated by me.

Second quote, you say people are too afraid of me to eject me.

Literal quotes. From the horse's mouth.

[unwnd]

Those are both game related

[Lady Lambdadelta]

Those are both game related

And the harm they do is not.

Like, are you this resistant to trying to be a better person that you'll sit here and argue, literal

"i didn't harm you, your feelings aren't valid. THEY'RE GAME RELATED"

?

Is that your actual position?

[unwnd]

I don't think I'm a better person nor do I think this conversation is a topic of morals

[Lady Lambdadelta]

I don't think I'm a better person nor do I think this conversation is a topic of morals

Kay.

If you can't understand why telling me that I'm terrorizing a game state into refusing to vote for me,

or why suggesting that somehow the game state is bad and that it's my fault

are harmful stereotypes for someone who had to leave behind a half decade of anger and rage in games, who still struggles with rage in games, who as a system is trying to be unique to ourselves and not be boxed

and especially

for someone who as a trans woman has had to yell most of her life to be heard, only to be told these things again and again and again as ways to shut me down?

Then I don't know what to tell you.

I expect this shit from people I don't know. Or people who try to hurt me.

Not from friends.

[Lady Lambdadelta]

I'm done talking about this, since you have no interest in talking about it.

Go ahead Cabd, sorry for derailing you with this nonsense. I'm done for... a while.

[Cabd]

Cabd why did you suddenly decide to pop up

Dude, I'm on kiddo time.

You REALLY want to know?

I slept in because Sunday is MY sleepin day then we went to the park for three hours because two year olds need to do a LOT of that unless you want to find everything your house in their mouths (not that stopped her from trying to eat one of the little light bulb things from one of the porcelain xmas trees)

Then we ran by the target at the train station near the park because kiddo goes through two gallons of milk a week and it's conveniently on the way home.

THEN I tackled the never-ending story of laundry and dishwasher.

THEN I worked on helping review a different game.

NOW I am here.

[unwnd]

I don't believe you're terrorizing it, my words were directed in such a way to get attention and see the thread's response

That's part of the game isn't it? Under no circumstance will me making an assertion about someone/something in the form of Mafia be related to their actual character. If it is, then it's on me and all I can say sorry if you felt that way. That is me speaking to you as an an individual and not merely as unwnd playing a game of Mafia

[Lady Lambdadelta]

I don't believe you're terrorizing it, my words were directed in such a way to get attention and see the thread's response

That's part of the game isn't it? Under no circumstance will me making an assertion about someone/something in the form of Mafia be related to their actual character. If it is, then it's on me and all I can say sorry if you felt that way. That is me speaking to you as an an individual and not merely as unwnd playing a game of Mafia

But you are saying this, by saying that the gamestate is being perpetuated by me (so it's willful) and that people are afraid to vote for me (so I'm causing that fear).

That's LITERALLY what you said in 2 lines.

In 2 lines you worked on erasing years of image and improvement. In 2 lines you made it harder to play this game, period.

In 2 lines, 2 simple easy lines for you, you took something I had to use to fight out of a situation that was NEVER fair to me.

That turned from necessary weapon into toxic burdensome detriment

that I have tried SO HARD to discard from ourselves. All 4 of us.

And put it right back on our shoulders.

I'm not okay.

[Lady Lambdadelta]

And you telling me "it's not personal" over and over again and not even stopping to fucking consider what you might have done wrong when I tell you directly that you hurt me.

Going so far as to accuse me of saying you're a LIAR. Instead of just stopping and going "oh shit what did I do"

It perpetuates the same shit that you're sayign. Because I have to try not to get angry. Because I need to either

get angry and prove you right and be miserable

or

shut up and try to talk through it, fail, get made fun of some more, and still have the stereotype.

You have made it lose lose for me.

[Cabd]

* raises hand *

I uh, don't think unwnd realized what was going on there and that the wording choice was unfortunate. ~I~ don't particularly feel afraid to go against consensus on an LLD read, as exemplified that I murdered her into the ground in Yggdra.

I do think that the claim, and the way it came out, and the FEELS around it are coming from a town LLD, in a way that absent my own role PM would make her the most town person in this player list from the outside looking in, and I find the scumreads on her absolutely baffling.

[unwnd]

It was never my intention and I will solemnly swear you to that.

We can reconvene later

But if you don't wish to do that, I will respect your boundaries as well.

[unwnd]

* raises hand *

I uh, don't think unwnd realized what was going on there and that the wording choice was unfortunate. ~I~ don't particularly feel afraid to go against consensus on an LLD read, as exemplified that I murdered her into the ground in Yggdra.

I do think that the claim, and the way it came out, and the FEELS around it are coming from a town LLD, in a way that absent my own role PM would make her the most town person in this player list from the outside looking in, and I find the scumreads on her absolutely baffling.

So are DGB/Wheme just seeing an opportunity in well, me?

[Cabd]

I don't know and I'm trying to understand where these scum reads are coming from.