UnCouTh mAfia - [UnCouTh eNding]

[goodmorning]

Still reading. It's difficult to do as I'm currently wearing two eyepatches as the result of an ice cream incident.

[Titus]

I'll self vote to avoid a no lynch.

I'm not going to let this town succumb to an upset stomach.

(Im fine with lynching UT too fwiw)

Not to rain spaghetti on your delightful smorgasbord, but this won't help. There are three votes on GoodMorning and only one on you that I see.

Egg voted AP.

UT or AP. I will no lynch if I have to.

[Titus]

God damn it. Phone post errors make me feel like a drunk turtle trying to say the alphabet.

[AngryPidgeon]

1.5 Days to deadline. My stomach will get upset if we no lynch. NL at this point is so absurdly antitown that even suggesting it is absurd.

[Bookitty]

I've just been thrown out of an all-you-can-eat buffet for eating more than all-I-could-eat (which is clearly bogus, I'm thinking of suing) and I'm in a mood.

No, seriously, AP, I'm on CDB/good morning. If there's a compromise lynch, no one is suggesting it. I'm open to suggestions. I don't want to lynch you (yeah, your offer to self-hammer moved you back to the town side of my equation, I admit it, and if you suckered me, well done) and I won't lynch Ffery.

GoodMorning saying that they're STILL reading the thread as an excuse for not participating seems really convenient to me. I don't like it. I want to lynch it.

Egg, Titus, can you please help us avoid a no-lynch?

[Titus]

Boo, the AtE from AP served its purpose, to get you to not lynch him. I pribably should lynch goodmorning here but I am frustrated by perpetually being ignored.

What the hell, Egg and I will lynch AP. Bookitty can lynch AP, we can get an AP lynch tomorriw.

VOTE: GM

Tommorrow AP.

[fferyllt]

Is that a lynch?

I would be paranoid about AP but I trust Nacho's read and I hope you guys give serious consideration to UT and Egg tomorrow.

It's likely my last day on the playing field and I sincerely hope we end the game with this lynch.

[Serene2]

VOTECOUNT

goodmorning (4): fferyllt, AngryPidgeon, Bookitty, Titus

With 7 alive, it takes 4 to lynch.

INFRACTIONS

Titus: 2/3
Angry Pidgeon: 1/3
fferrylt: 1/3

[Serene2]

[Lady Serene taps her foot impatiently, still brandishing her semiautomatic weapon. Behind her, the door opens. The Smart One and the Loud One descend the stairs, looking distressed. Smart Serene is holding a cordless phone. Loud Serene is brandishing an RPG-7 rocket launcher.]

"Have they picked someone yet?" asks the Smart Serene.

"They've been pussyfooting around," says Lady Serene, "but I think they're almost at a decision."

"Good," replies the Smart One. "I can only hold off the hostage negotiators for so long."

[The portable phone in the Smart Serene's hand rings. He answers.]

"Hello, you've reached the crime scene," he says. "Mhm. Yeah. Okay, so we're agreed. We'll trade you three of their thumbs for a large pizza. What do you mean, 'don't cut off their thumbs?!' What is this, the Lincoln-Doulgass debates?!"

"Hey!" says the Loud Serene, "Tell them I want fifty live lemurs on top of the other demands!"

"Quiet, don't be absurd," says Smart Serene. "It's a delicate process. Anyway, yes, we want fifty live lemurs. No. Sixty. Sixty lemurs and a leprechaun. Of course they're real."

"They're jerking us around, man!" says the Loud Serene. "Tell them they have no sway over us!"

[The Smart Serene shushes the Loud Serene again.]

"Of course I'm being serious!"

"THE SERENES DO NOT RECOGNIZE THE AUTHORITY OF THE STATE POLICE!" screams Loud Serene, as the Smart One tries to talk over the shouting. "THE SOVEREIGN REPUBLIC OF THE BADA BING SHALL NOT BE HELD DOWN BY AN IRON BOOT!"

[At this point, the prisoners point at goodmorning. They have chosen her for death. Before goodmorning can protest. Lady Serene aims her semiautomatic weapon at her and fires. Several shots miss, because she's a Serene and not a trained marksman. Finally, one of the shots finds its mark and ends goodmorning messily.]

"What?" asks the Smart Serene, still speaking to the hostage negotiators. "No, that wasn't gunfire. Uhhh. I had beans for lunch."

"TELL THE NEGOTIATORS THAT THE STREETS WILL FLOOD WITH THE BLOOD OF THE NON-BELIEVERS!" shouts the Loud One. "YOU WILL ALL PERISH IN FLAMES! FUCK THE POLICE!"

"Ummm, no," says Smart Serene, "that's just the television. We gotta go."

[Smart Serene hangs up the phone. The three of them investigate the body of goodmorning.]

"Well," says Lady Serene, "we're going to go back upstairs for the night. We can't really dispose of this body while the building's surrounded, so just toss it in the corner. We're gonna try and find a TV so that we can keep track of the news coverage.

"Do you even know how to use that thing?" asks Smart Serene, pointing to the rocket launcher in Loud Serene's hands.

"Eh, I'm sure I can figure it out," replies Loud Serene as the three of them walk back upstairs.

[The door closes and the lights go out. Night has begun.]

goodmorning, "The Klutz," Vanilla townie, suffered lead poisoning as a result of the daily vote.

[Serene2]

[The basement door opens as the lights come on. The Loud Serene and the Smart Serene are lugging a ridiculously old television down the steps while Lady Serene is dragging a cable behind her. The captors are visibly tense. An air of mortality and disdain hangs over the basement. Loud Serene starts fiddling with the hookup for the television, and Lady Serene addresses the prisoners.]

"There is no time for polite pleasantries," she says. "We've brought this TV down here so that we can follow the news coverage. Since this situation... somewhat... vaguely affects you, we've decided to let you watch too."

"What the fuck is coaxial re-uptake input?" says the Loud Serene. He turns toward the Smart Serene. "What is with these instructions?! Hey, do you speak Swahili?"

"I do, actually," replies the Smart Serene, who instead turns the instructions over to the English side. "Try that."

[Loud Serene continues fiddling with the back of the television while the Smart Serene inspects the prisoners. Lady Serene taps her semiautomatic weapon against the palm of her hand.]

"Oh, hey, look, someone's dead. Which one is this?" he asks.

[He stands over Egg, who has been shot in the head overnight.]

"Looks like Egg... got scrambled." says the Smart One.

"YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" shouts the CSI Miami theme as Loud Serene finally gets the TV working. Internally, the Smart Serene wishes he had some sunglasses to put on. The Loud Serene changes the channel to CNN, which is now featuring 24-hour coverage of the siege at the Bada Bing.

"... hour 17 of this standoff. The strip club has a sordid history, as the building was once the home of the Church of the Unblinking Eye. In 1984, charismatic cult leader Michael Majiffy led his followers to mass suicide in the basement of the building---"

"Usually we'd have Reverend Insincere deliver a eulogy," she says, nodding at the Reverend, who is passed out drunk next to the hot water heater. "But I think we're past that point today. The FBI has joined the standoff, so I suggest you people get on with the experiment."

[Lady Serene glares menacingly at the hostages, tapping her booted foot on the hard floor. Loud Serene is shouting into the telephone, asking why Dominos refuses to deliver to an active crime scene. Smart Serene is scribbling some calculations on a piece of paper. The stench of death is upon you all. The Serenes expect more of the same. Day 6 has begun.]

Egg, "The Bridezilla," Vanilla townie, was scrambled Night 5.

VOTECOUNT

No one is voting.

With 5 alive, it takes 3 to lynch.

INFRACTIONS

NONE!

Deadline: (expired on 2015-04-23 09:00:00)

[Titus]

That Egg kill makes about as much sense as a salmon swooping down to eat a hawk breathing underwater. Egg was extremely mislynchable, despite my protests no one really believed me on Egg being town.

This doesn't change that UT or AP should be the lynch but something's off here.

[fferyllt]

Very off. offsides off.

AP? Thoughts?

[Untrod Tripod]

This doesn't change that UT or AP should be the lynch but something's off here.

nah, don't adjust your reads because of the changing game environment

just keep pushing those mislynches

[fferyllt]

This doesn't change that UT or AP should be the lynch but something's off here.

nah, don't adjust your reads because of the changing game environment

just keep pushing those mislynches

:/

[Titus]

@UT, Nothing really changed for me with that kill regarding alignments. It does suggest scum want me around in endgame which is frightening. That is the only reason scum should be shooting Egg and sacrificing a mislynch. If it's me v Egg v someone else, I made it abundantly clear someone else was getting lynched

So my thought is who wants me at endgame and why?

[Untrod Tripod]

Boo would want you around, but the simpler explanation imo is you scum

[Titus]

So I kill the one person who could easily be mislynched over my objection? Endgane scum need clean hands. That kill in a scum!Titus world makes no sense. It gains me nothing but proving I was right. I would get the same thing by mislynching Egg.

Are you seriously scumreading Boo or are you just throwing mud like a pig?

[Bookitty]

Here's where I am, paranoia evident like the ketchup stains on my Keds.

Fferyllt: Why is she still alive? Could I be wrong about her? I surely have been before, and she's for sure smart enough to fool me. Still townreading this -- I think the paranoia may be deliberately induced.

Titus: She could be buddying me. I need to reread and think more about this. I am not surprised she wasn't nightkilled; I'm surprised Ffery wasn't.

Untrod Tripod: I was fine with him until he said "Boo would want you around." Why would I want Titus around, UT? Can you explain that to me?

AngryPidgeon: I don't know. The Egg thing is a little obvious imo if he's actually scum. I also need to think about this more.

Is this one of those situations where you're supposed to No Lynch and see what happens tomorrow? We know there is just one scum left, so is that the right move now? (It's not a rhetorical question, I've never understood the criteria that have to apply for no-lynch to be the right move and I'm sincerely asking now.)

[Titus]

No lynch is debatable but weak given how far we narrowed scum. We can lynch one player we think is the most scummy here, we should take it. If we no lynch, scum dictate the three in lylo. No lynch is best in mylo with no conftown after a day of discussion. Even if scum nick a PR, it helps solve the game.

UT knows I am not voting you for the same reason I was never voting Egg. Wagon analysis. If you were scum or try to outthink scum (which is how I approach the game), you would see that.

Ffery being alive could be deliberate paranoia inducing like hearing a bull charge in Spain.

[Untrod Tripod]

Untrod Tripod: I was fine with him until he said "Boo would want you around." Why would I want Titus around, UT? Can you explain that to me?

Bookitty should never be lynched.

stuff like that

So I kill the one person who could easily be mislynched over my objection? Endgane scum need clean hands. That kill in a scum!Titus world makes no sense. It gains me nothing but proving I was right. I would get the same thing by mislynching Egg.

Are you seriously scumreading Boo or are you just throwing mud like a pig?

I'm not ruling anyone out (ffer I'm ruling out a little more than the others, but the fact that she's still alive is concerning)

I don't think Bookitty is scum, but NKA forces me to consider it as a possibility, given the makeup of the town at this point.

As for the Egg kill, he was an unknown commodity, and Titus seems to have the rest of the game townreading her nicely enough to avoid her lynch. me and AP were expressing concern about you, so if Egg went that way it could have been curtains for scumTitus

hell, I could be wrong. it could be Boo. it could be AP. it could, Morgan Freeman forbid, be ffer.

[Titus]

That's a turnaround so fast given your near total confidenve in me being scum at day open. Like a roadrunner dog mix chasing its own tail fast.

Also if you ever think I am widely townread without role assistance, guess again. That just almost never happens. It makes me feel awkward when that is true.

[Untrod Tripod]

I don't like a no lynch today.

right now it's

4:1
3:1 or 3:0 after a lynch
2:1 after a NK
1:1 or 2:0 after a lynch

if we no lynch it's

3:1 after a nightkill
2:1 or 3:0 after a lynch
1:1 after a nightkill

I'd rather have two chances to lynch correctly than one.

[Untrod Tripod]

That's a turnaround so fast given your near total confidenve in me being scum at day open. Like a roadrunner dog mix chasing its own tail fast.

Also if you ever think I am widely townread without role assistance, guess again. That just almost never happens. It makes me feel awkward when that is true.

*shrug* I'm always snarky off the cuff

my jangly bracelets give me sass

[fferyllt]

Here's where I am, paranoia evident like the ketchup stains on my Keds.

Fferyllt: Why is she still alive? Could I be wrong about her? I surely have been before, and she's for sure smart enough to fool me. Still townreading this -- I think the paranoia may be deliberately induced.

Titus: She could be buddying me. I need to reread and think more about this. I am not surprised she wasn't nightkilled; I'm surprised Ffery wasn't.

Untrod Tripod: I was fine with him until he said "Boo would want you around." Why would I want Titus around, UT? Can you explain that to me?

AngryPidgeon: I don't know. The Egg thing is a little obvious imo if he's actually scum. I also need to think about this more.

Is this one of those situations where you're supposed to No Lynch and see what happens tomorrow? We know there is just one scum left, so is that the right move now? (It's not a rhetorical question, I've never understood the criteria that have to apply for no-lynch to be the right move and I'm sincerely asking now.)

Assuming one scum, it's one day too soon to consider no lynch by my rules of thumb.

I may be able to fool you - it's debatable that I'll fool you easily again anytime soon. I absolutely can't fool nacho for the number of game days we were in the game together. I've done that to him once, and I doubt it will happen again in the foreseeable future. The main reason he and I didn't dance even a tiny bit in this game is because we didn't have to figure each other out.

But, I'm utterly confident that my play has not only been transparently town, it's been transparently masons-with-nacho-and-TSO from our earliest interactions. If you go back and look you'll see that Nacho and I both gave in-thread handshakes to TSO. We expected him to be the mason who went the furthest in the game and we wanted him to have something to point back to. The irony is not lost on me.

If you guys want to lose your minds and lynch me, do it today. I will not be a pleasant person to deal with if you try to mislynch me in mylo and I hate eating penalty yards.

[fferyllt]

that said, I'm confused as hell to be alive and egg dead. I'm still trying to figure out what sort of scum strategy made that an optimal choice.