Survivor Mafiascum Rankdown (Properly Dead. Leave it dead)

[Xalxe]

Hey I'm here to bitch abou--

Fuck

[Cephrir]

298. Batgirl (notscience) - Arkham Asylum

"It seems there's a web of people though, I wasn't aware of all these people voting Bane."

Batgirl was a newbie, so it seems only fair to give her some sort of pass for lacking awareness. But hers is a story we have seen before, and it begins with thinking social players like her when actually they're just social. She mentions early in the game that she thinks Lady Shiva, Huntress, and Ventriloquist are great. A quick confessional trip reveals that Lady Shiva does not think of her at all, Ventriloquist calls her a lurksack, and Huntress has this to say:

Spoiler:

In essence, Batgirl's game could best be described as passive. Her only real ally is Catwoman, who was handcuffed to her, so that alliance pretty much makes itself. Her gameplan is pretty simple; she hears that Deadshot doesn't like her, so she starts talking in confessional about how uch she wants to kill Deadshot and how lame Deadshot is and etc. Such sweet OMGUS. This appears to be all the planning she can be bothered with, and it's not clear whether she was really trying to actually do very much to get rid of him. Batgirl and Catwoman basically get left out in the cold without many other solid connections, making Batgirl the second-fake-merge boot.

Basically, it seems there was a web of people, and Batgirl wasn't much of a spider whisperer.

[Klick]

Batgirl was a lovable lurksack though!

[KingdomAces]

To be fair, OMGUS usually works much better in Survivor than it does in mafia.

[Crazy]

297. Brienne of Tarth (Chevre) - Game of Thrones

"We're slowly creeping toward that uncomfortable stage where people are truly sizing one another up and I never know how to handle it, so I just wait and do well in challenges until someone decides to pull me in."

In her confessional, Brienne comes off very likable and I can't help but root for her even though I know she gets eliminated. Brienne also gave a valiant effort to try to stay in the game, which is great to see for an early boot. Unfortunately, though, most of her tribe seemed to describe her as "quiet" which is the adjective of death in Survivor. Brienne didn't seem to have many social connections, apart from Dany, and while she was a likable presence for her short time in the game, ultimately she didn't last long enough to have much of an impact.

[DeathNote]

NO. Brienne had so much impact for me

One of those, why did we eliminate her again?

[Klick]

296. Xander (Pizzadudes7) - Greece

"So.......hi. My name is Xander, and I really hate my tribe. My tribe originally spoke of how strong we were, but when it came down to it, they sucked. Nobody is as strong as they said they were and some don't even show up to challenges. I'm sick of myself, Monika, and Gus (who basically run this tribe) pulling all the weight of the tribe. We need to start winning, or we're gonna get steamrolled by Zante."

That quote is so wrong and so right at the same time.

Xander was one of the more interesting members of Cergio 1.0. He didn't post in his confessional much at all, but he was in the gray area between being one of the strong active members of the tribe and, uh, not. When I met him on Lefkas... he didn't say very much! Fortunately for him, Gus said less, and he was kept around as a potential number. Come merge, he was in between a Lefkas alliance and an Old Cergio alliance that were conflicting. He could have played both sides fairly well, but he voted Gobias against his allies during the Monika vote and came to lose the trust of both sides. Everyone stopped giving him any information, and he was unceremoniously voted out "second" in merge.

[xofelf]

Brienne was my faaaavourite. Such a sad departure.

[Cephrir]

Xander was a deeply confusing person to play survivor with.

[xofelf]

Xander fit his avatar, that much I remember thinking.

[Xalxe]

Xander fit his avatar, that much I remember thinking.

Yeah, that was not an accident.

[xofelf]

That doesn't surprise me in the slightest. Did you give him the avatar that fit him the most, or did he specifically choose to play that kind of guy once you gave it to him?

[Xalxe]

Ping me to check my files later and I'll see what his order of avatar request was.

[DeasVail]

Xander was my second choice, Anna-Liza my third. So glad I got A-Liz though!

[Xalxe]

Xander was, in fact, his first choice.

[xofelf]

A-Liz <3 Her hat is still the best hat.

[DeasVail]

Such a rocking hat

[Drench]

hi i'm v/la saturday through tuesday and thursday through friday so just pop that one in your pipe and smoke it

295. Julie Chen (T-Bone) - Names Are Hard

Chen: Welcome back bitches. Julie has just been voted off of Brodoku. Julie how are you feeling?

Julie: Well Mrs. Chen, at first I was sad and disappointed. No one wanted to give me a chance. Now I'm just mad.

Chen: Yeah gurl lay it all out there who are you mad at?

Julie: Everyone ya know? I mean look, I knew the deal on Brohio. I was the replacement, I know they are agreed before I even got into the game that they were gonna vote out the replacement no matter what. I missed several days in the game, I understand the score and would have done the same thing. Too bad they didn't vote me out first, because then at least I wouldn't have gotten invested in the game and wasted the last couple of nights trying to play.

Chen: And after the swap?

Julie: I thought things would be different. I'm gonna approach people of the other tribes, and see if we can't get a cross tribe thing going. We lost the challenge however, and a decision was made to quietly take me out. Too bad quiet isn't something these chatty-chatterbugs can do. That plan was immediately leaked (trust issues amirite?).

Chen: So what did you do?

Julie: I tried to build some rapport with my new tribe. Here I was subject to dismissal by Doge, ignored by HTTP, but I don't fault either of you guys for that, HTTP wasn't around, and Doge obviously wasn't interested in a new plan, that's fine I don't fault em for it. Dave, Frenchie, and Tommy I'm a little more disappointed in, I thought maybe we could build something. But Dave pleaded ignorance to the plan he obviously knew about, and Frenchie and Tommy didn't want to upset Y. It's too bad Y is in this tribe, I personally thought Frenchie and Tommy were cool guys.

Chen: Do you think you had any chance at all to stay?

Julie: The score was laid out to me, appease King Y or get voted out. So I had a long real conversation with him...real on my end anyway. From Y, and only Y, I was subjected to numerous backhanded insults and threats. I didn't get this blatant disrespect from anyone else. But I shut my mouth and took it on the cheek, hoping that maybe he'll see some benefit of keeping me around, eventhough I was so UNREASONABLE as to want to save myself in this game rather than banter over a Julie Chen joke. I mean there would have been time for that after I wasn't voted out, but nope I'm the unreasonable one for being more interested in saving myself, for being more interested in getting quick replies from people rather than writing a well thought out novel every time I wanted to convince someone to do something. I didn't banter the way King Y wanted me to, so he put the lid on everything. Told his allies to stop talking to me, lest he arrange they get voted out next.

Chen: Would you say Y is in control of this tribe?

Julie: Completely. He's an A-Type of person. He was a leader during our challenge, and he's a leader on this tribe organizing the alliance against Brohio himself and keeping everyone in line. When confronted with the idea that he could be seen as the de-facto leader by the rest of the tribe he responded with brevity and a threat. Maybe he has the hidden immunity idol in his back pocket? That's the impression I get for someone who is so bold in his attempt to control the tribe. But I'm sure he'll tell you guys otherwise when I'm gone, but no less than 4 different players told me the vote against me wasn't budging unless he budged it. Which is funny since I'd only expect that kind of blind loyalty from his old tribemates.

Chen: Is there anything else you'd like to say?

Julie: Probably. I don't fault 8 out of 9 members of this tribe for what happened tonight. I know I was asking a lot for people to draw a line in the sand and flip the vote when there was still 20 players in the game. Just know you've voted out a girl who would have been fiercely loyal to her allies, if only given the chance. I'd be great if you guys vote out Y the next time you go to tribal though. I'd personally appreciate it. I don't want to see him group back up with The Kid (who I gather was also his ally running things on his old tribe). Anyway I'm gonna vote him right now, so hey if everyone switches to him that would be cool too. At the very least I'll hand him a vote that could count against him later, so there's that. There's still 30 minutes or so left if you guys make the switch with me. On that note I apologize to HTTP for originally intending to vote him, sorry bro I was just trying to save myself ya know? Either way, thanks for your time.

you guys remember when reed fleming did that whole rehearsed ugly stepmother thing to missy and some people were like yas queen!! yas!!! and some other, normal people were like this is fake as fuck....ugly

anyway the former gets julie chen to here and the latter ends that

because, apart from this thing, was there really much to julie chen? i know there's been a lot of talk in our secret skype group where we all complain about peg being an insufferable dickwit as to whether julie should've gone ages ago, and tbh, i fought for her a fair bit, but i think now is a good place to end this. she was never really in control, if you wanna talk about game or whatever, but that's not the point of this, the point is whether julie was entertaining, and like. once again. public rants? nice. public rants that suck? let me sum it up:

[Drench]

SPECIAL POSTSCRIPT:

Just know you've voted out a girl who would have been fiercely loyal to her allies, if only given the chance.

like honestly zzzzzzz

[xofelf]

Funny thing, when Julie asked me about some plan to screw her over due to being a replacement I really didn't have any idea what the fuck she was talking about. Her public rant told me more about what she thought was going on than what actually was going on with why she was being voted from what I knew. Y wasn't even trying to dictate to me, I was honestly pretty disappointed I didn't get to meet this Y she was portraying. He sounded like an actually decent character.

[D3f3nd3r]

Apparently her rant was part of the reason you idoled me out Drench

[Drench]

UPDATE: "reed fleming" is actually someone i know irl, i was thinking of reed kelly lmao

[Drench]

as a special gift to subscribers i have annotated julie chen's speech for your perusal

bit of banter

[Xalxe]

is there a best post category in the Mashies

[animorpherv1]

294. Michelle Bachmann (PiggyGal15) - #2016

"This TC is a goddamn mess. I just hope Barbs plays her idol on herself, me/her/Carly/Hills vote Lincoln, Ted/Lincoln probably still vote Carly, and Ben and Rand vote either Barbs or Lincoln, it's really up to them whether they believe Carly and I or not. Absolute worst case scenario, Rand and Ben vote Carly and Hills never comes on to change her vote, so Carly goes home "

Michelle's story is one we've seen many times before, and here is very little unique to Michelle. Her activity was very low (to the point that I figured she may end up being replaced out at times). People talk about her as if she's a nonentity because that was pretty much true, and ends up skirting into the merge partially because she's not a threat and partially because she was immune most of the way. When merge comes around, she finds herself lacking in allies and sees herself get swallowed alive near the beginning on the merge because no one cares if she exists and the group just got done with a taxing vote.

There's not much else to say.