California Trilogy: City of Angels - On Camera (Game Over)

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Kkkkooooooobbbbeeeeee!

I miss you, you hunk for burning, shoot-guard'ing love... you asked me, "do you think about me?" The answer is a resounding 'yes' - I can do little else but think of you. Ever since that memorable dancing hippo spectacle when we feel in love, there is nothing on my mind but the virile contour of your regal African features, the tight but soft wrinkles of your lips, and the quivering of your eyes when you look into mine.

Around me, is nothing but a cast of tiresome, pedantic bores demanding that I make choices I care none about. I care for nothing but you, my one and only, and they are plotting to keep us apart. You're the only Evangelion I want to control, whatever Evangelions are, you're the copilot I dream of in Unit 02, and although my AT field, as described in Wikipedia, is the most powerful ever detected, strong enough to block out "light, magnetism, sub-atomic particles, everything" - my AT field does not have the strength to block out delicious thoughts of you.

Oh if only you could send me a sign...

Tabris collapses in a chair and begins to sob in what will surely be an Academy Award Best Crocodile Tears performance.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Tabris spins on his angelic feet, with all the grace of a manga cartoon.

What's a crone anyway?

I don't trust anything that Mr Locke McSlop is saying.

The thought of Kobe Bryant's smelly sneakers enters Tabris' mind. Tabris welcomes the thought, and looks dreamily behind the ears of Locke McSlop.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Sorry Mr Locke McSlop, but perhaps it will be a consolation for you to learn that I do not trust your counterpart, whose criminal mind is well known outside the confines of this play.

He gave information that was completely useless, which you had an opportunity to fill in with the manipulative rubbish of your invention. Now that your main blackmailer is laying still in a coffin, oh so conveniently, perhaps you feel that you can bulldoze us with your confident attorney persona. Well, the Angel of Evangelion or whaterver the heck I am, has vowed to continue where your murdered pursuer has left off.

Tabris crosses his arms defiantly, lets out a very loud fart, and pretends it was only a burp.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Tabris bats his eyelashes, and looks decidedly as if he's considering turning his back on Kobe, and becoming gay for Death.

And you believe that rubbish these drunks are spewing? You think they do not try to fool us? Say, that's a nice scythe that you hold. May I hold it for a moment?

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

It matters not, McSlop, for his arguments were most excellent; whether he was from your faction, or a third faction, or an innocent, is of no concern to me. Beware of tour buses. They have big wheels. If he's innocent, then his suspicions had the appeal of logic; if he's guilty, his statements have the same appeal of logic, with the difference that this logic can seat 48 people and a driver, and go 500 miles without refueling.

So yes, with my impenetrable AT field and copilotage of Unit01 and what not...

Tabris hesitates a little. He coughs in the direction of the understudy, or whatever you call that fellow hiding under the stage that whispers lines that actors forget.

*cough* *line* *cough*

A violent coughing fit ensues that awakens the fellow.

"A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies" -

declares Tabris, realizing that the fellow is holding the wrong script.

Quote removed. Read the rules. - Mod

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Tabris stands up suddenly, and yells out in a panic, stepping up and down and flailing like he's BrÃœno or something:

Cut ! Cut! I just thought of something. Stop the filming!

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Never mind! Brain fart! Carry on...

Like a cat that just tripped, and licks himself like it was part of the plan, Tabris sits down and calls for the makeup crew to refresh his eye shadow.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Tabris erupts in garrulous laughter, slapping his knee.

That was my imitation of Angel! HahhahhAhhhah HAh aHAhahhah ahha

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Yelling out from the dressing room...

Like the two of you are telling us the truth? One of you, if not both of you, is a filthy rotten liar!!!!!!

Tabris comes out wearing a tutu for the comical act of the play.

Where's the parrot? I forgot the parrot.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

A light bulb goes off above Tabris' ostrich plumed head, and sets the feathers on fire.

Undergoing a change? What change?

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

We already knew that the choices were good or bad, did you add anything that is not obvious from the setup, that might actually be the truth considering the source?

The orchestra starts the music, and Tabris starts to dance the cancan with his tutu flipped over his keister. The crowd is eating up this trailer park trash like it's a fine dish.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

I love the way this scythe feels. It's heavy and smooth. Like it's been smoothed for eons with the rubbing of metatarsal bones. It's been held quite firmly.

Death I love it when you refer to the living at meatbags. Contempt becomes you. It really does.

Tabris really means it, and returns the scythe, with a slightly perceptible sigh of envy.

Your question is one for the ages. Which of these rotten filthy vermin-infested advocates is telling us the truth? I rarely think, or at least think successfully, but in this case I cannot discount the horrifying possibility that both these rat finks have all the nobility of spirit generally attributed to personal injury lawyers.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

The tutu and cancan cabaret act is over, now begins the scene where Locke McSlop attempts to psychologically manipulate Tabris into submission, since it's well know that his AT field is impenetrable, and only the sneakiest sneakster can worm his way through this molecular armor or force field or whatever it is.

But no one can fail to notice Tabris' pants filling with a soft, flowing purple ooze, only Tabris, being an angel and all, pretends that nothing out of the ordinary happened.

Soon after, wafts all over the stage, an odor recognized by the lactose intolerant, and frequent Pepto-Bismol clients.

Regret on Tabriz's face can be read. He really shouldn't have pigged out on his mom's tub of blueberry Activia, followed by a jar of marinated beets, and topped with a basket of Concord grapes.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

I'm reminded of a story,

starts Tabris, shaking his leg,

where having too much of a good thing, like root vegetables, sources of fiber, or even beneficial dairy can lead to disaster.

For instance, the evil that tries to penetrate my AT armor, having failed two scenes in a row, are probably in a bind, and getting desperate. That's why I wouldn't put it past those nasty tricksters to put two of their own clowns on parade, with both of them feeding us horrifying bits of misinformation.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

But is it true? And how desperate are your buddies just about now, after being defeated twice in row?

Tabris' impenetrable AT field starts to glow

.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Yes and the only way you could finagle a win over this expert town is by putting two of you scumbags at the advocate desk to make sure you don't contradict each other.

For instance.

But god knows what the evil ones plot when I'm piloting my Evangelion.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Oh great, I have to contend with yet another purveyer of unreliable opinions.

Personally I think that most actors, ON AVERAGE, are 99% certain that Odbody will end the day horizontally, in a silk-lined casket.

You, who just hours ago, was suggesting that the evil ones would be pitching themselves into the pit of fire of suicide missions, now, you dare suggest that they are motivated by self-preservation??? When, just hours ago, you reminded the whole audience that it was prescribed that only two evil ones are the

Deus Ex Machina

deciding factor? When did those facts change? When it was convenient for you to be pursue your evil objectives, perhaps?

I answer with a resounding YES! Yes, Odbody knew that today was the last day of his life, and Locke McSlope must very near be thinking the same, and to boot, they have been humiliated twice in row by superior minds, now, now you think they wouldn't RISK ALL????

Quote removed. Read the rules. - Mod

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

My Evangelion flies very near the speed of light, however, since I shot the brakes, you have to depend on natural friction to come to a stop.

Death is starting to grow on Tabris. Somewhere, Kobe Bryant knows, and sheds a silent tear of joy at the prospect of being free to boink anyone he feels like after the games.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Sounds like you tripped on your own shoelaces, so-called Angel, and now need to consult with your little evil-making pals. I can't wait to hear what you're going to parrot.

Tabris laughs maniacally, and, in anticipation of needing to be drunk, downs several jell-O shot brought on a platter by the world's favorite entertainment catering company.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Daddy!

The audience is shocked to learn that Huey Lewis could have fathered an Angel with an impenetrable AT force field.

*audible gasp*

Since you seem to believe in the existence of cultish evil-doers in addition to non-cultish evil-doers, can you amaze the whole room with some theories, given what we now know? You know I respect you, Papa.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Dad, when you say "I'm not sure the "neutral" decision in this situation is neutral per se, more likely detrimental to non-members of scientology," I'm really confused. What is the optimal strategy for both groups of evil-doers? What do you think they are plotting? Are they working at cross-purposes? If so, how? Please explain it to me like you did when I was just a wee little angel boy.

By the way dad, last time I was home, I found our wimpy doormat really scummy. Did I forget to mention it?

I promise I'll be careful around volcanos, but you know, my AT-field is impenetrable!!!

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

I have this sinking feeling that Angel is presently conspiring with his co-conspirators on a big round conspiracy table, under the conspiratorial cone of QT.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Tabris' heart skips a beat. Could it be love?

I think I'd like a paternity test.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Odbody, you say that '"99% chance" that I will die today, just because someone as obviously untrustworthy as Angel says that I should?'

I'm very concerned because Angel was acting as if your death by way of stoning was a foregone conclusion, not that long ago. Do you recall this?

Do you recall him saying that the evil-doers' best strategy is a series of glorious kamikaze missions? Does that ring a bell?

Well now he proposes something completely different. He says you're an evil-doer, but now your death is far from a foregone conclusion, and he assumes that if you're an evil-doer, you'd have self-preservation on your mind. And we know that self-preservation is very, very different from being a scumikaze. Now, we should acknowledge that, given that you are slated to be stuntmaned to your death, your death is indeed a foregone conclusion - or as close as can be under these circumstances. Why is he making a 180 on these key positions, that he held, and believed in fervently?

I challenge this, and he runs off, all flustered, possibly to meet with Satan himself, or his agents, on the QT. Is it to ask how he's to get out of this hole he's dug for himself?

I said it before. One of Odbody or Angel is very evil.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

It's alright, dad. We'll get you off to rehab as soon as possible.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Tabris wets the nib with his tongue twice, and dips his quill in the ink well.

Dear Angel.

What would you pick, right now?

Mother, Maiden or Crone?

Love, Tabris
PS: Send my regards to your uncle Belzebub

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Tabris musters to himself.

Good grief. Dad is having conversations with his keister again. No wonder his career went down the toilet.

Now Tabris speaks up.

Dad, there is the obvious choice, and then this obvious choice is being pushed by two of the most unsavory characters of my acquaintance, and, if I recall correctly, also supported by someone I believe to have a great many relatives in hell. Now that I think of it, all his Facebook friends have brimstone and fire in the background of their pictures...

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

So Miss Kelly Garnet in a bikini, you believe everything we're told? Are you becoming complacent because of earlier victories? You don't suppose that the evil ones are hungrier than they were earlier? You don't believe that they are scheming harder? You think they're letting us have the right choice with a 3-second puzzle? Just like that? You think they roll over like corpses?

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Is that what your associates from the Round Table of Demons have told you to say?

I'm disappointed.

I noticed that you have failed to address the gross (and extremely disturbing) inconsistencies I pointed out. Completely. Utterly. Failed.

I'm reasonably sure that the evil ones decided to go ALL IN this time, following two humiliating defeats in a row. You don't suppose they'd put up with a third, and even a fourth loss? I believe this is the last scene where they can pick advocates, which means that the fourth scene is in our favor as well. This is their last chance to wrestle an advantage from us.

This is DO OR DIE for you and your misleading friends.

I for one, think we are being completely bamboozled. Whatever obvious-as-a-pimple-on-the-prom-queen's-face these untrustworthy attorneys with degrees from Antigua (don't mess with the weed from Antigua! It's weeeeckid!), I'm not voting for.

Anything but what the desperate advocates are advocating. I too strongly suspect a double dose of lies, supported by a succubus disguised as and Angel.

"Mother" - is that what they want to ram down our throats like it was a sweet lollipop? My impenetrable AT field is ON. I'll pick anything but that option.

Evil is evil. Evil is rarely just plain stupid. Evil is never a doormat. Evil never sleeps. Evil fights harder than good, the stakes of evil are always higher.

WOuld YoOOOoOoooooUuuUUu settle for 4 defeats in a row, Angel? Hmmmmmmmmmmm? I think not. I think you are refusing to settle for 4 defeats in a row. That's why you're fighting so hard. That's why you put scummy scum scum big guns as advocates, and you're putting whatever credibility you've got left supporting them in their falsehood. You probably think you can get away with it!

Tabris sits down and pants, his brain short of oxygen from talking too much.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Tabris paces impatiently, and throws his fist against a wall. However, his impenetrable AT force field gets in the way, and he can't make contact.

The answer is NoOoooOoooo! They don't get the info at all. That's what happened just yesterday, dad! Are you losing your memory? Am I going to have to spend the rest of my life stopping you from putting your hand in the toaster? From getting on a bus in your nightgown? From ordering a million antique ceramic electric wire caps from ebay using my MasterEvagelion card?

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Put that down, dad! Put that down.

Tabris looks around, filled with hope, to see if Death is near. It isn't. What happens, Tabris wonders, when Death is the only person you trust in the room? What happens?

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Of course, love, I know that the advocates are chosen by the decepticons. But - the decepticons aren't the ones whispering what the hints are, are they??? I thought not, but I might be mistaken.

Do we have news from the coronrer as to the recent spate of deaths, such as, are they the same manner of death? Were they evil and deserving to die?

You know the scent of jasmine makes my knees buckle.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

I thought the decepticons chose good/bad/whatever but the supreme overseer of all things chose the hints. That's my understanding. And my understanding is much like the AT field; impenetrable, at the molecular level.

My theory is this. The decepticons were humiliated twice. Surely, this will bring up long lost memories of being bullied as children, being made fun of because their AT-field was like Swiss cheese, because their nails were dirty and didn't learn to tie their shoelaces until they were 12.

Now, now they're angry. Now they have to take out the big guns. They might have been impotent, roll-over pasties twice in a row, but you bet they have now grown teeth and claw. Whatever they tried before failed spectacularly. We laughed. We mocked them. We kicked dirt in their unknown faces. We forced them to carry our waste in buckets to the farthest compost pile.

Now the decepticons must succeed. They hunger to show us what they are made of. They want to win. And frighten. And intimidate.

Today can't possibly be the cakewalk that the first two days were.

And remember, Death, my love; tomorrow is going to be easy as pie for us.

So today is the decepticons last chance to show us that they have testicles. Testicles that are connected to the usual hardware, but with thick walled, oversize diameter metal pipes that can take very high heat and pressure, shooting a super-concentrated ooze of syphilis bacteria.

Tabris gets all dreamy, then gets a hold of himself.

They're going to pull all the stops.

Like having two deceptions as our advocates. Or some other strategy. Whatever they do; you can be sure that they are sparing no expense in fooling us throroughly.

What point is there for them not to totally scumikaze this scene, when all but two decepticons are going to be dumped like useless ballast just before The Apocalypse? They're not running for mayor. They don't care for town cred anymore.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Yes, I think that the decepticons aren't allowing to let themselves be robbed of glory a third time. They have found that subtle deception is failure. Today is their last chance to go with the BIG LIES.

Therefore I... I...

Tabris spots a maggot crawling near his feet. He looks up. He sees what appears to be little red candles in Death's eye sockets. They glow and flicker from the breeze of maggots crawling out.

Had Tabris not drunk the love potion in big gulps, he might have found the scene to be comical, much like All Saint's day. But instead he looked adoringly at the magnificent skull, so old, and so wise; weak for having no muscle tone, yet so strong; and the scythe, the scythe with the curious scent of jasmine. He longed to kiss the bare teeth as if they were luscious, hungering lips.

Where was I?

Tabris asked, caring about nothing else but finding himself in the silken embrace of the Grim Reaper.

Oh yes. I think I remember. I think that the probability that we are being bamboozled is so high as to go the opposite way of what is suggested.

Suddenly, it struck Tabris. The Crone represents wisdom, repose, death, and endings represented by the waning moon. The Crone. And death. Death. Irresistible Death.

I wonder what maggots taste like... they must taste of...

*and Tabris' voice tapers into an inaudible whisper.*

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

We should pick anything but what the scumbags are telling us to pick. I don't think we're getting reliable information at all. My thinking is that whatever the answer of the no-brainer kindergarten obvious puzzle they are feeding us, is incorrect. I think they got together to make sure they win this point after they lost the other two, and have little hope of winning the fourth.

Since whatever alternate choice is WIFOM, you've already mentioned a preference for Crone, and Crone is my beloved Death; Crone is fine with me.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Yes, Angel. At first I thought only one of you was a decepticon. But now - now that you are covered in the pestilent muck of accepting UNCHALLENGED and UNQUESTIONED the twin claims of two of the most dubious characters in the Evangelion universe and whatnot, I can only conclude that you are all in cahoots.

You were too quick to conclude. Too quick to accept. To quick to CREATE A MOMENTUM and you hope other players will follow. You planned it all to look so obvious. A no-brainer.

Was failure to get the momentum to swing in your favor the problem in the first couple of scenes? Yes, it's payback time today for the decepticons, but I will have none of it.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

What I mean is that they've had 2 defeats in a row already. Tomorrow's scene isn't likely to swing in the decepticon's favor. Therefore today is the day that you and your demonic associates have to wrestle at least one point from us.

Every sentient meatbag out there knows that this isn't backwards logic. You are using rhetoric and hyperbole to discredit my fine argument; you know very well that rhetoric and hyperbole is the tool of Satan himself.

For a moment, Tabris recalls that he was bullied as a child for his uncontrollable use of rhetoric and hyperbole. Yes, thinks Tabris, this sure is rich coming from me.

And Death surely WILL NOT FAIL to notice that YOU FAIL to mention the high probability that the decepticons have sent off two of their own in an act of despair, wasting little more than two of their members are are so tainted as to be UNSALVAGEABLE.

I cannot imagine a town-Angel wilfully ignoring this very real possibility.

Quote removed. Read the rules. - Mod

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Maybe some actors are no longer considered as 'resources,' maybe they're dead weight. Worthless cannon fodder.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Locke McSlop can be fired. Also, after Scene 4, he will be of no use at all. No sale.

Say, can someone let us know whether the dead were decepticons???

Also, were anyone slain by claimed god-appointed vigilantes?

Quote removed. Read the rules. - Mod

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

OH dad! Play "The Power of Love." You know it makes my impenetrable AT-field tingle!

I won't be around much today and tomorrow, I have several Evangelion units that need controlling. They need a high level of synchronization ratio in the entry plug, I'm the only that can do it. I'll be off to Terminal Dogma for the weekend!

The harmonica brings Tabris such great childhood memories...

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Tabris is overwhelmed by a premonition that Clarence Odbody is going to bring in boat loads of awesome.

He goes back to cutting glass using only the force of his AT field, for a local outdoor art demo tomorrow. He hopes to sell a lot of Evangelion merchandising, such as googly pens, belt buckles, paperbacks, and plastic likenesses of himself. He's bringing his good autograph marker.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

They can only keep two of their own evil kind, for the final play of the Apocalypse. Remember?

The playwright has designed this so that some of them evil ones are mere cannon fodder to earn these precious points. Do you recall a few days ago, one of them being evil incarnate and for all to see, trying to steer us, quite ineffectively, to disastrous decisions? Though he failed, he did try.

I ask to the below questions in the expectations of answers from you.

(1) What do the evil ones earn by hiding their evilness and being un-suspected, when several of them will be ditched like useless ballast when the final two evil ones are chosen?

(2) Do you think that it's their advantage to let us good ones win every single point and let themselves be in an disadvantageous position in the apocalypse?

(3) Do you recall one of them evil ones, not so long ago, doing exactly what they are supposed to do, which is to sacrifice themselves to win that point? That the evil one turned out to be laughably ineffective is besides the point; you see how they tried earlier, don't you think they'll try again, except this time, with stronger determination, cleverer plots, and airtight strategy?

(4) Do you realize that tomorrow will be a cakewalk for us good ones to earn the point?

(5) Given that they lost the first two, and will probably lose the last, how desperate do you think they are today?

(6) Do you think they are wimpy doormats barely playing to their win condition and are merely rolling the red carpet for us to make the apparently in-your-face obvious decision and let us win the point AGAIN, so easily, completely failing to challenge us in any way?

(7) Do you really believe that they are handing over the victory on a platter? If so they are very poor sports and should be banned from the Actor's Guild altogether for not reading their lines properly, and my wrath will be such that my impenetrable AT field will pulsate angrily for weeks.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Besides all that, you're probably scum flying under the radar. I have revised my reading of your evilness/goodness ratio unfavorably.

You seem quite impervious to the most logical scenario happening today considering the evil ones' earlier embarrassing failures and possible future sources of deep shame.

Something is not quite right with you.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

You may be Angel, but stop thinking that you are the center of the Universe! There is the great play of good and evil, you are but a pawn. As I am. Hopefully a thinking pawn. This play isn't acted out with your feelings in mind, or for the purpose of wounding your pride and reputation, but for a great victory of evil over good. They are devious, and must be stopped.

A cakewalk for tomorrow is what I concluded when I read it. I forget now... I might try to recollect from memory but I do not guarantee accuracy. In fact I can nearly guarantee complete lack of accuracy. We can discuss this later when we have the facts before us. I recall thinking that Day 1 and Day 4 would be our cakewalks.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Unless you're a decepticon...

The Universe could do worse than having you at its center.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

I find your earlier statement that you might lean towards Crone, if not voting Mother, to be nothing short than reverse-psychology BS from caught scum. May I remind you that my AT-field is impervious to BS?

It's as you are trying to sneak in a bit of what we call in Evangelion Unit 02, WIFOM.

First I wouldn't have voted Mother because that's very clearly the choice scum are pushing, and we are getting total nonsense information, quite possibly from two scumbags in cahoots, and a pre-planned choreography/strategy/tap-dance to ensure a win and

avoid the humiliation of peeing in your pants in front of the class a third time.

IN ROW.

Thank you for reinforcing the case for Crone.

The only thing that would cause me to rethink this is if you were actually going to vote Crone.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Good observation, Angel. Indeed Mr Locke is really antsy and pushy for us to vote Mother... while fleetingly pretending he might vote Crone.

I remember the defunct Mr JellyBean's arguments that Locke was an evil character of the worse kind. These arguments were convincing, well laid out, and rock solid. Surprise! Mr JellyBean was shot down. I do not trust Locke one bit and I may be a fool, but not big enough a fool to do his evil bidding and allow myself to be lead to a bad choice.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Tabris awakens from a deep slumber, a slumber that pierced through his impenetrable AT-field as if it were Swiss cheese.

He recalls a dream where some spectators, that aren't part of the play, mistakenly heckled so loud that they were heard as if they were on the stage.

It seems like only a dream now, but during it, it seemed bloody real.

But like all dreams, traces have been erased by the power of Evangelion.

Tabris looks at the spectators. He is filled with a memory that the heckling was that

Crone is the only worthy choice

. "Vote Crone, you stupid retards, there's no other freakin' choice you dumbasses!" before being dragged out of the theater.

Good morning all! Do we have Captain Crunch in the pantry? I need me some sugar.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

I don't remember. I tried to put the heckling out of my mind, but it hurts... hurts deep. There was a long explanation that I forgot. We're all idiots for not seeing what a no-brainer the Crone choice is - something to that effect, showing the calculations. I wish my memory was better.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Tabris is steeped in sorrow from the harsh critique of his performance, and of the script that does not speak of Evangelion with enough accuracy. Yet, Tabris speaks up, his voice choked with sadness, to Death; for those that are shunned by the living, Death always has welcoming arms.

Those were my thoughts exactly, Death. We can test the lying liars with Crone just the same as we can with Mother. It's so in-your-face obvious.

The explanation that it's just another ploy by the decepticons to make us choose Mother at all costs is very attractive. The decepticons don't seem to mind at all making themselves obv-decepticon, and being stoned to death the next day. Thus they serve poisoned wine in front of the whole town. Later, while the good citizens are punishing the branded decepticons for their shameless misdeeds, the other decepticons are hiding safely in the shadow of the executioners.

Those shadow dwellers are going to make it to the play's end scene, while the rest of the suicidal decepticons are going to burst into flames of their own making.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

I'm with Death, I was also pointing out how between Mother/Maiden/Crone, it's scummy to push for a particular one to prove that an advocate was lying.

Give it up Gaspar. This line of argument will not improve upon repeating.

Tabris hears himself speak, and thinks he's giving good advice. Good advice that he himself should follow more regularly.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

More importantly, I wanted to check a name (Stewart Godwin it was) to ask why he suddenly cares (he sure didn't seem to, earlier on) when his decepticon friends are on the road to losing once more, how delicious it is, when I noticed that...

THERE ARE 15 DEATHS LISTED BY THE POWERS THAT BE.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Well dear we got the message, and it's clear that we got the message. Even the crew behind the cameras know we got the message.

Then we get the green light from the lighting guy.

Just like yesterday, the decepticons were quite likely majorly behind the scenes, today, they sure seem to be crowding the stage.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Come on Angel. You're full of foul gases. They can't penetrate my AT-field of course, but I can smell them. We've had tons of time to state our positions and make up our minds. It's not like we weren't ready to roll when we got the green light. If CKD hadn't hammered in the choice, I would have done it. Why are you now berating us for sealing the choice most of us had pretty much agreed upon? What a weird, weird reaction?

I think CKD wanted to hammer in the right decision to get some last minute town cred, even though he's been advocating the wrong decision all day long.

Oh, I remember that smell... it's the smell of the fish gutting and processing plant at Shizuoka. On a windy day, you can smell the stench all the way to Yokohama.

Tabris has a violent sneezing fit retching from his irritated airways.

I don't care about extras either, Death. They're replaceable.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Let's get this show on the road.

vote: Crone

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Take

THAT

, Locke.

You ain't fooling the mighty Unit 02 Evangelion with the impenetrable AT-field. Eat your heart out.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Tabris is busy controlling Unit 02, which is pretty much a red, pared-down transformer, without the transform ability. It has four optical sensors, a box-cutter style Progressive Knife, and a Needle Gun Launcher located in its shoulder. Tabris is contemplating engaging Evangelion Unit-01 in combat in the bowels of Terminal Dogma.

I have a plan for my decision,

declares Tabris

, everything shall be done in the proper order. I don't plan on making the same mistake as yesterday.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

There's nothing to talk about until we get the green light as far as the CHOICE goes.

However, I'd like us to talk instead about which of us here is decepticoniest. Most of us are basking in the limelight, with a minority behind the lenses and the spotlights. We are in an odd situation; the majority cannot hear the minority. And the minority has fewer choices than ever.

Perhaps they will take our suggestions into consideration when it comes to utilizing the stuntman. Their call. But then there are other reasons to try to identify the decepticons right here on stage. Keeping the pressure is only one of them.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

So... dad.

Can you and your multiple personalities tell us who you think is the decepticoniest? I'm especially interested in the opinion of the unwashed nymphomaniac wild child personality. Can you channel it?

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

I thought of that.

See.

It all depends on who you want to contradict, it all depends on who you find scummy, and who would want to play WIFOM with.

I already noticed Thok is leaning "NOT push the button."

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Godwin looks like the Creature from Slime Lake. Remember that Evangelion episode where fighting that monster, and Unit 01 and Unit 02 couldn't grab the creature on account of the pond scum that greased him up?

The problem with a hypothetical lynch is that after announcing the plan, it all becomes WIFOM. The decepticons might say "push the button" with the expectation that we will do the opposite, which is what they might want.

How about deciding an order for players to announce their choices, from scummiest to least scummy?

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Here's how we can do it.

This is the list in alphabetical order.

Each player takes the most recent list, and moves 3 players, but NOT themselves:

Angel, played by Gaspar
Carrie Fisher, played by Talilan
Clarence Odbody, played by PookyTheMagicalBear
Dweezil Zappa, played by Mighty Orbots
Glen Stewart Godwin, played by Thok
Huey Lewis, played by StarKiss
Mr. Green, played by sottyrulez
Tabris, played by GoofballsAndBaloons
Valentine Wiggin, played by Panzerjager

This is my choice (I moved Talilan down, and Thok and Panzer up):

Glen Stewart Godwin, played by Thok
Valentine Wiggin, played by Panzerjager
Angel, played by Gaspar
Clarence Odbody, played by PookyTheMagicalBear
Dweezil Zappa, played by Mighty Orbots
Huey Lewis, played by StarKiss
Carrie Fisher, played by Talilan
Mr. Green, played by sottyrulez
Tabris, played by GoofballsAndBaloons

So now, the next player to show up should take MY list, and move 3 players.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

"Decepticons" is just a goofy in-joke between myself and the Grim Reaper.

Can't we have some fun, you kill joy?

And now to Angel - I don't think it matters that much in what order we do it, because after we complete the exercise, we can have a discussion to change the order. That can be telling as well. More information.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

EBWOP

I said "you kill joy" but really I should have said "you pedantic constipated soul-sucking kill joy."

I apologize for the error.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Let me help the n0Ob.

Carrie Fisher, played by Talilan
Huey Lewis, played by StarKiss
Valentine Wiggin, played by Panzerjager
Angel, played by Gaspar
Glen Stewart Godwin, played by Thok
Clarence Odbody, played by PookyTheMagicalBear
Dweezil Zappa, played by Mighty Orbots
Mr. Green, played by sottyrulez
Tabris, played by GoofballsAndBaloons

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

I'm not a fence sitter... My vote will depend on who votes for what.

I'm willing to bet that the scum has already expressed their preference, to set the mood. You know. Scented candles, dim lighting, a rose by the bedside... Unit 02 starts to loosen his tie... the rohypnol in the wine in front of you... you know what's next. WIFOM date rape!

Save for Panzer, all my biggest suspects have expressed a preference. The "not push the button" cluster is definitely scummier than the "push the button" team. I get healthy pro-town vibes from sotty, Pooky is unfortunately opaque, and I'm still of the opinion that Talilan is town on account of the KY Krew switch.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

The following characters haven't touched the scumlist:

Carrie Fisher
Glen Stewart Godwin
Huey Lewis
Valentine Wiggin

Come on it's not like we've got anything better to do while waiting for news from upstairs.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Tabris goes into a trance and says some really out of character nonsense.

Right now we are deciding whether or not to push a button. One outcome is good for the town, the other is good for the scum. We have no information at all. We have to guess.

Other people are in a hidden thread. They are deciding who will be lynched. Only players in that group can be lynched. However, they have the ability to switch one player from here to the hidden thread, so in practice no one is immune from being lynched. They can send us a sound or image message, so we can find out if a lynch has occurred, or if there was a nightkill, etc.

Tabris vomits all over the stage. Not prop vomit. Real stuff.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

If you're not a fan of the strategy I proposed, the least you can do is suggest a better one.

I'm a ears, willing and eager to follow your most excellent superior idea, which I expect should come very shortly.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

OK Godwin, since you think each of us should give a list, WHY DON'T YOU DO IT?????

You know, instead of twiddling your thumbs and criticizing. How about doing something constructive?

Your next post better have a list in it.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

OK, I'm in.

How about you break the ice with a vote, Angel?

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

I thought we were fake voting to pseudo-lynch.

How is pseudo-voting for the button dilemma more informative than voting for characters we find scummy?

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

We have no advocates for this scene. That's why I'm trying to get players to say who they find scummy, but some people seem to really want to stop this from happening.

What's an Evangelion gonna do?

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Yep. sottyrulez wasn't in that scene, and I don't recall him jumping up and down off-camera urging Thesp or MO to send us the message that we should NOT pick Crone. Also, I bet some scum KNEW we were heading in the wrong direction, laughed their heads off, and smugly voted what they knew to be the correct choice.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

I thought the decepticons, after some humiliating failures, had gotten desperate enough to put two scumbags as advocates, and this was their last good chance to get some points. I thought Elmos was scum, and I put a lot of faith in JellyBelly's case against CKD. Everything made perfect sense. All the pieces of the puzzle fit together perfectly.

Furthermore, I didn't realize that they'd get three more chances. I knew there would be a total of seven scenes, but I thought the last three didn't involve a choice. I was quite certain I was outsmarting the decepticons and come up a hero. I feel like a fool.

But hey that's not exactly a new emotion.

BTW we can't use dice tags. So that pretty much rules out our ability to go random.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Tabris starts shaking his Evangelion AT-field Unit02 and starts speaking in tongues.

To recap:

There was hewitt who voted before the green light.
There was Gaspar who cleverly held himself out of the whole debacle.
There was Thok who did the same, perhaps disingenuously.
There was CKD curiously wavering back and forth.

We had 5 voters on Crone. And 4 OFF Crone. According to my scum distribution theory, I expect one scum on the wagon, and one scum off the wagon.

It's a bit easier finding scum off the wagon because there are fewer players.

One of John Locke, Angel, Glen Stewart Godwin, Kelly Garrett must be scum.

So Gaspar, if you're scum, you ought to come clean right now and tell us. If you're not, then you have 33% of finding scum among Locke, Godwin and Garrett. If you use your brains, you can do better than with dice! Or worse if you're me...

Now I can do the same on wagon, because I know my own alignment. I bet one of the 4 remaining players on the wagon is scum. More to come when I'm back off-camera.

Tabris shouts out:

Evangelion ahoy! Allelujah!

Then he falls on the floor shaking. Clearly he's having delusions, hallucinations, and epileptic attacks. No wonder no one has heard of half these people Tabris speaks of. And what is this singular obsession with the word scum? Does it come from his past in adult movies, or as a stagnant water biologist?

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

That's because I'm assuming 2 scums. Mostly because my brain can't handle the calculations if there were to be an odd number, such as one or three. I'll definitely concede that if there were 3 scum, there would most likely be 2 on the Crone wagon, since they won the point.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Interesting. Is "don't push the button" the default for a particular reason?

Is that automated or determined by the decepticons?

I wonder.

Oops Unit02 just farted helium.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Pray explain who and why.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Sorry. The decepticons will make their move. Then I will make mine. I will not be bullied.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Exactly. Who are the decepticons? Do you want me to give names so that they can WIFOM us more easily? Whose side are you on, anyway?


Evil Kneivel? What does that mean again?

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Tabris has more hallucinations. He speaks in tongues again.

I've already gone through that exercise of saying what I probably will do based on who votes for what. Why do you pick on me? Your town rating has dropped several rungs.

To repeat, and add vivid detail: I think Thok-Evangelion is scum, I'm iffy on Gaspar-Evangelion's male half. Leaning town on Talilan-Evangelion, Orbots-Evangelion. The rest could go either way. Special mention for Pooky-Evangelion no sticking to the script.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

I think the picture means that the stuntman is the most famous that ever lived.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Are you even reading? Check my posts in iso.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

598

621

And if I may add. I retract my earlier statement that you give off healthy non-decepticon vibes.

I now see scum in both groups.

It's like I'm some sort of unpredictable wild card for you and your scumteam. Are you guys trying to decide how much risk to take depending on how many townies you can count on to vote for your best option?

I am now leerier than I was before.

To take your earlier compilation:

PUSH

Mr. Green, played by sottyrulez - obvscum at last
Clarence Odbody, played by PookyTheMagicalBear - purposely opaque
Carrie Fisher, played by Talilan - town

DON'T PUSH

Angel, played by Gaspar - 50:50
Glen Stewart Godwin, played by Thok - scum
Huey Lewis, played by StarKiss - not trustworthy

UNDECIDED

Dweezil Zappa, played by Mighty Orbots - town
Tabris, played by GoofballsAndBaloons - town
Valentine Wiggin, played by Panzerjager - recently replaced

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

I doubt they'd ask our opinion about who needs to be stunted.

Am I way off base here thinking sotty is scum? He's not pestering the other two so-called fence-sitters. I see nothing pro-town in his line of inquiry.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Post 34 is about Maiden/Mother/Crone, not Push/Don't-Push.

Yes, I could go either way. Take that back to your QT at the earliest opportunity and chew on it with your little scheming demon friends.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Er reading between the lines and jogging my ever-dimming memory I seem to recall a dream or two... possibly two. I think Mr Green might be right about the meaning of the message. Which means that a certain somebody is sleeping at the switch. We here do not have access to a reminder as to how the stuntman may be appointed, so perhaps *cough cough* we might read our own character fact sheets *cough cough*

Tabris start coughing madly and it's obvious he won't stop until the hint is taken by whomever needs to take the hint.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Continuing to cough, Tabris writes on the blackboard:

PUSH

Mr. Green, played by sottyrulez - I just recalled a detail about sotty that I forgot when my head was hot and he'slikely town actually.
Clarence Odbody, played by PookyTheMagicalBear - purposely opaque
Carrie Fisher, played by Talilan - town
Angel, played by Gaspar - 50:50
Valentine Wiggin, played by Panzerjager - recently replaced

DON'T PUSH

Glen Stewart Godwin, played by Thok - scum
Huey Lewis, played by StarKiss - not trustworthy

UNDECIDED

Dweezil Zappa, played by Mighty Orbots - town

UNDECIDED NO MORE

Tabris, played by GoofballsAndBaloons - town and I think imagonnawanna push that button.

*cough cough cough retch cough*

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

*cough cough cough argh cough*

I'm the last person to recommend someone to turn off the snark about sending players back to their QTs, having been repeatedly guilty of the sin myself, and fully planning to continue.

*cough cough cough spit cough*

Godwin picked "no push button" early on and it looks as if nothing will make him change his mind. *cough* He's not showing any sign of watching for reasons why his initial choice may or may not be the best one.

Like Godwin knew something from the get go. He set his position up before the day even started. What does that mean, boys ans girls??? Also, Godwin pitched his "no push button" tent pretty early on, which leads me to believe in demons setting the mood. And Godwin can get away with it because I'm the only one really pressuring him, along with Talilan to a lesser but increasing extent.

I mean really. Go read Godwin's posts. Tell me if I'm crazy. He picked an option out of the clear blue sky, and he's not willing to change it. Godwin merely obliquely challenges anything else to entrench his initial selection. NO? Don't believe me? Check. Please. Check.

Here I fundamentally disagree with Cartalilan Firsherlan. Though I agree that all eggs will be not in the same basket, I'm a lot less confident that Gaspangel is trying to pull a double-layered-WIFOM-surprise-switch, though the two heads thinking differently

*cough cough*

may be a setup. However at the same time I am getting better vibes since Angel joined souls with FemAngel. I'm very ambivalent about this hydra.

Also, supposing that both Angel and Godwin are demons, I'm not sure which one is groomed for endgame. I would rather think that Angel would be. He's the one switching positions, while Godwin is entrenched from the beginning. Also, Angel is at least acting more townie, while Godwin doesn't mind if his scumslip is showing under his skirt.

*cough cough cough spit cough cough cough cough spit cough cough cough cough spit cough cough cough cough spit cough cough cough cough spit cough cough cough cough spit cough cough cough cough spit cough cough cough cough spit cough*

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

*stuntman cough cough cough stuntman cough cough cough cough spit cough cough cough cough spit cough cough cough cough stuntman cough cough cough cough spit cough cough cough cough spit stuntman cough cough stuntman cough wake up cough stuntman cough cough stuntman cough stuntman*

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Hey kids

Given that Godwin Thok Suey decided his choice from the get go, what do you think of his recent statement that he's choosing whatever Tabris and Odbody aren't choosing????

Does that not make your spidey sense tingle?

*STUNTMAN cough HINT cough STUNTMAN cough cough cough cough spit cough cough cough cough spit cough cough cough cough stuntman HINT cough cough cough spit HINT cough cough cough spit stuntman cough cough stuntman HINT wake up cough stuntman cough cough STUNTMAN cough STUNTMAN*

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

I don't think anything is truly random. I don't believe Glen Thok Godwin so-called random choice. If he's scum, certainly not.

*stuntman cough cough cough stuntman cough cough cough cough spit cough cough cough cough spit cough cough cough cough stuntman cough cough cough cough spit cough cough cough cough spit stuntman cough cough stuntman cough wake up cough stuntman cough cough stuntman cough stuntman*

Maybe Talilan is right. Maybe I should vote

with

the scumbag.

This is torture. It's just a goddam button.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

How about calling Carrie Fisher, Ms. Fisher? Would that work for you, FemGaspAngel?

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Dad! That's because you haven't been around as much as I would want you to be. It's as if you're

lurking

in the aisles. I suppose it's alright if you've reached the stage of your musical career where you sell peanuts and hot dogs at the Saturday morning dime theater.

Also, your dramatic self, and your kissy self, had earlier conflicting wills regarding the pulsating, glowing, buzzing red button of temptation. Have you settled the matter amongst yourselves?

Tabris is really proud of himself for the way he plays to his dad's multiple personalities. How charitable of him to coddle the insane so gently!

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

There's some weirdness in hydras talking to each other in-thread about starting a qt... and some shirking of responsibility by the StarKiss hydra.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Aren't you already voting, Ms. Talilan Fisher?

I'm not liking Thokster Godwin's fake vote, I mean, who forgets to bold??? It's as if he knows "Don't Push" is the wrong choice, and he's pushing it, but he doesn't want to write his name on it.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

What good is a Condorcet with only two options?

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Shall I hammer that button or wait for Wiggins_Faul to catch up in the next few hours?

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

"If I were scum I'd have made PUSH BUTTON the bad choice, believing that most people won't be able to resist pushing a big ol' button."

One more reason to push the button. If the demons had this thought, I bet they would assume we'd WIFOM ourselves into not pushing the button. So we should push it.

I don't get the sotty DGB-hammer hate. But if someone else wants to do it, by all means, help yourself. I do want to be on record for pushing the button. Weak reasons yes, but enough to lean in that particular direction. Not to mention how I just can't bring myself to vote with Glen Thokwin.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

The cough lozenges worked at last.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

I have to talk to my husband first. He's a mathematician that keeps complaining that the medical researchers he works with do crappy research. This is his chance to use his brain for something really significant, something that will improve mankind measurably and permanently, by helping us win this key battle against evil informed minorities.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

The probability of a given set of 5 numbers containing at least one "VERY GOOD" is 68.3%.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Now suppose that the first player is out of luck, and doesn't have a "VERY GOOD" in his or her set.

The next player has a 71.3% chance of having a "VERY GOOD" in his or her set.

In the extremely unlikely event of 6 consecutive failures to find a "VERY GOOD" then the last player has a 91.9% chance of a "VERY GOOD."

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

I talked to my husband, and there's a way to calculate the likelihood that someone lied.

Any objection to my going last, or to have the last player follow my instructions?

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Death, you wrote: "...

but once we find a set containing a 'very good', do you have a plan how we narrow down which particular number IN the set to vote for?

"

Indeed, it's a bit like the game "Mastermind." Have you ever played "Mastermind?" Of course not. You all have video games now. But when I was a wee Tabris, that's all we had. I had a pocket Mastermind and every time I was finished with my school work during class, I'd pull it out and challenge a neighboring student.

However, there is scum here and the scum iza gonna lie. I have one little trick in my pocket to try to catch one scum. It's not guaranteed, but the threat is real, I am not bluffing, and I hope that fear of getting caught will keep them honest.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

A beautiful lady lurking in the shadows said: "

I'm not understanding your plan Tabris, could you formulate it all into one speech

?"

Naturally, as far as elimination of numbers go, what you describe is a no-brainer. But once we have a positive result, we can narrow it down by asking again with a set of partially OVERLAPPING numbers.

That's the easy part. The more complex part is the detection of liars. What my

husband

gay lover patiently explained to me is that

you can actually calculate how many players may have lied

. A-ha. My lover is not just a mathematician, he's a statistician, of the Bayesian persuasion. So he can actually adjust the results with a predicted value of how many players may be lying, for murderously accurate results. There is more, and more deadly, but I don't want to show the scum all my weapons.

Conclusion, if anybody dares lie, I will catch them. There are ways. And the ways are many.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

town>>>
Goofballsandbaloons
MightyOrbots
Talilan
ShadowLurker / VP Baltar
Thok
hewitt
<<<scum

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

I would still like to go last.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Alright folks.

This is how "MasterMind" kinda works. MasterMind has different colored pins (6 colors), and there is no lying possible. This is the same, only with 5 "colors" and some people may lie.

Now, a little green bird tells me that there is no way that ShadowKellyGarnetLurker is going to lie, and that's a huge plus with this scheme. With this, I blindly trust the numbers he has chosen as unbiased.

We can get a "VERY GOOD" guaranteed, and if the scum tries to lie, we will catch them and string them up.

So we can do it this way:

SL asks: 74,14,39,23,51

Whether if he gets a "NO" or a "YES," the next player asks for OVERLAPPING NUMBERS:

Mighty Orbots asks: 39, 23, 51, 18, 52

So if SL gets YES, and MightyOrbots gets NO, that means that the "VERY GOOD" is within the first two numbers. See? We'd just need to narrow it down to two.

Also, we should be able to double-check whether someone is lying pretty quickly. No one can lie unchecked with this system. Overlapping with 3 numbers means that the scum is painted in a very tight corner and will be caught if lying.

The chances of there being ONE "VERY GOOD" in those first 15 numbers is 99%.

To show my calculations (actually, those are my

husband

's gay lover calculations, the probability of "VERY GOOD" is easily computed as the 1 - P{everything else}.

So,

1- (60/75*59/74*58/73* [....] *44/59) = .99

Instead of choosing from a set that contains one or more "VERY GOOD" we can actually narrow it down to an actual "VERY GOOD."

So here are the overlapping sets:

(1)

74, 14, 39, 23, 51

(2)

39, 23, 51, 18, 52

(3)

51, 18, 52, 37, 69

(4)

52, 37, 69, 63, 47

(5)

69, 63, 47, 66, 20

(6)

47, 66, 20, 34, 5

(7)

20, 34, 5, 56, 41

Now, if we get results that deviate from the expected number of "VERY GOOD" which is, I repeat, 99% chance of hitting one, this means we may have TWO LIARS IN A ROW. Should that happen, anyone is free to unexpectedly double-check a set of numbers that someone else already asked. Of course, if someone does that it reduces the span of numbers, so let's suppose that we ask for 12 numbers instead of 17. Investigating 12 numbers, the chances of a VERY GOOD is still 95%.

And to put it another way, if we FAIL to get a VERY GOOD, we will catch scum, for sure. Either way we win something today. A VERY GOOD, or a scumbag.

My plan to go last was about making a surprise spot check on whoever is more likely to be lying. But if hewitt can agree to do a spot check on the other players, either of his own choosing, or by concensus. I happen to trust myself more than anyone else, and I'm not sure letting scum have any control on how gets to spot check is a good idea.

This being said, we're probably better putting a very townie player in the last spot, rather than a less trusted player. Start with a presumed townie, and end with a presumed townie. That's the best combination to make sure we have true results.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Alright folks.

This is how "MasterMind" kinda works. MasterMind has different colored pins (6 colors), and there is no lying possible. This is the same, only with 5 "colors" and some people may lie.

Now, a little green bird tells me that there is no way that ShadowKellyGarnetLurker is going to lie, and that's a huge plus with this scheme. With this, I blindly trust the numbers he has chosen as unbiased.

We can get a "VERY GOOD" guaranteed, and if the scum tries to lie, we will catch them and string them up.

So we can do it this way:

SL asks: 74,14,39,23,51

Whether if he gets a "NO" or a "YES," the next player asks for OVERLAPPING NUMBERS:

Mighty Orbots asks: 39, 23, 51, 18, 52

So if SL gets YES, and MightyOrbots gets NO, that means that the "VERY GOOD" is within the first two numbers. See? We'd just need to narrow it down to two.

Also, we should be able to double-check whether someone is lying pretty quickly. No one can lie unchecked with this system. Overlapping with 3 numbers means that the scum is painted in a very tight corner and will be caught if lying.

The chances of there being ONE "VERY GOOD" in those first 15 numbers is 99%.

To show my calculations (actually, those are my

husband

's gay lover calculations, the probability of "VERY GOOD" is easily computed as the 1 - P{everything else}.

So,

1- (60/75*59/74*58/73* [....] *44/59) = .99

Instead of choosing from a set that contains one or more "VERY GOOD" we can actually narrow it down to an actual "VERY GOOD."

So here are the overlapping sets:

(1)

74, 14, 39, 23, 51

(2)

39, 23, 51, 18, 52

(3)

51, 18, 52, 37, 69

(4)

52, 37, 69, 63, 47

(5)

69, 63, 47, 66, 20

(6)

47, 66, 20, 34, 5

(7)

20, 34, 5, 56, 41

Now, if we get results that deviate from the expected number of "VERY GOOD" which is, I repeat, 99% chance of hitting one, this means we may have TWO LIARS IN A ROW. Should that happen, anyone is free to unexpectedly double-check a set of numbers that someone else already asked. Of course, if someone does that it reduces the span of numbers, so let's suppose that we ask for 12 numbers instead of 17. Investigating 12 numbers, the chances of a VERY GOOD is still 95%.

And to put it another way, if we FAIL to get a VERY GOOD, we will catch scum, for sure. Either way we win something today. A VERY GOOD, or a scumbag.

My plan to go last was about making a surprise spot check on whoever is more likely to be lying. But if hewitt can agree to do a spot check on the other players, either of his own choosing, or by concensus. I happen to trust myself more than anyone else, and I'm not sure letting scum have any control on how gets to spot check is a good idea.

This being said, we're probably better putting a very townie player in the last spot, rather than a less trusted player. Start with a presumed townie, and end with a presumed townie. That's the best combination to make sure we have true results.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Actually, the mod's answers are like the little black and white pegs. And unlike MasterMind, we don't need to order the pegs. Just find where one of a certain color is located.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

SL didn't ask the question yet, merely said that he WILL ask the question.

Any list of random numbers is worth any other list of random numbers. I happen to trust that SL does not have knowledge of the number's meaning and therefore cannot manipulate them.

As for who goes last, it's to ensure that if there are signs of something not kosher going on, we have a townie double-checking. We need someone we reasonably trust to be a townie to do this. The last person going in cannot be double-checked, and has the power to double-check others. It's very dangerous in the hands of presumed scum. I can think of several things they could do with this, but I won't elaborate as I don't want to give them ideas.

In fact, it would be best if SL went last. It's a key spot.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

If you think my plan sucks, why don't you suggest a better one, genius?

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Asuming no one lies. I'm not sure I understand this plan, can you please show all your calculations.

Is there a plan to catch liars? Is there anything to stop scum from lying? Does it matter with that scheme?

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Don't forget, we have the scummy players going LAST, which means that no one trustworthy can re-ask their questions. Whether we choose to do this or not, if the threat doesn't exist (because we actually have scum in the last positions), we risk being mislead. No?

I must be missing something as usual. I always do.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Regardless of which plan we end up with, we need a presumed townie going last. I'm disappointed that my preferred choice, SL, cannot make it, but I'm satisfied with MO's pro-town performance enough for him to hold that key last position.

Any objections to MO going last?

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

You guys are still acting like we're in a low-end sports bar.

I have a vague memory that we are supposed to be playing bingo in a church basement or something.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Good for you...

This boat is real!
I'm on a MOTHAFUCKIN' BOAT!!!

I effed a mermaid!

Playing bingo with effing Carrie FISH-er!

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Godwin,

Only a scumbag would worry about an excessive amount of VERY GOOD's in any given set. Are wou worried about narrowing it down to the

correct

VERY GOOD???? Like they're not all equal? Jesus H Christ. Not to mention how unlikely that scenario is.

Does this ship have a plank?

Oh yeah, and your "girlfriend" from Folsom says he misses you. The FBI is still looking for you, too. I could make a phone call.

Yeah I'm cranky but I haven't gotten any with Unit 02 since I caught the H1N1 flu.

I think I need a coconut passiona fruit cocktail in a carved out pineapple with dry ice smoke coming out of it, a maraschino cherry, and a paper umbrella.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

And what makes you think that SL's list was not random?

You think I'm going to trust a list made by a possible non-townie over a list provided by SL, the towniest player on this mothaf__in' boat????

No "random" list of numbers provided by anyone but SL can be credibly believed to actually be random.

Crawl back to your dank jail cell before I unleash Unit 02 on you.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

You are incredibly idiotic to even suggest that a set of random numbers would lend itself to one scheme or another, they are random - unless SL was stricken by an incredible stroke of bad luck, like the planets aligning during a solar eclipse.

Oh I forgot, I have a stack of stinking love letters from your fiancé at Folsom. Maybe you'll recognize the "perfume." He complained that life is not the same since you escaped, the new cell mate doesn't seem to like candlelit prison cafeteria dinners and lard massages as much as you did.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Desperate to spread suspicion around, Godwin, are we?

You're still on the FBI's top ten most wanted list.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Tal, stop pestering Kelly. It's not productive and can only help the scum. Don't help the scum.

Leave

Britney

Kelly allloooooonneeeee! She's a human being! Boo hoo hoo...

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

So that yellow light doesn't have anything to do with slowing down my question? I haven't asked it yet.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

I'm expected to take my clues from GodwinscumThok and ask for {74,14,39,23,51,63,47,66,20}? Urgh.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Alright then.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

The numbers I listed in post 1080. No? Is that correct?

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Alright then, I'm off to see the Wizard.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

The Heavens said "no."

Sorry. Is that 3 "no" in a row??? That's pretty odd.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

God I'm getting paranoid.

HOLD IT A MINUTE.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

THOK, withdraw your question.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

*calculating*

beep beep bloop beep bleepy bleep bleep

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

If you don't mind I'd like to run this one by Unit 02. Unit 02 has an on-board calculator that performs all 4 operations at the speed of a hand crank.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Unit 02 is hosting a radio show, he'll be back home in 4 hours. I have the bubble bath and the metal polish ready va va va voom.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

I checked a few things on my own, and Godwin can ask his question, but he cannot make special requests for filet mignon from the Folsom cafeteria. They will be denied!!! Eat Nutri-Loaf like the rest of the wretched inmates.

I don't want anyone to rush past that, though. I will be running things through the Unit 02 calculator tonight. It's very high tech, there's a print out from a roll of paper when you pull down the crank. We have to think strategically.

Locke was likely the correct lynch, and will confirm or deny the existence of the much touted Guild. If Locke flips evil, with so few players present, is indicative of MORE THAN ONE scum within our midst. There may be multiple lies. MULTIPLE! Also, there's something else more long-range we must consider, but I must revise my calculations, and I'm rather tired.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Death, you should know whose head you just lopped off with your scepter, haha.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

I spoke to Unit02. There's very little that we can do effectively, but there will be options. In the meantime, hewitt, who is next in the order, should send in his question.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Yeah. I think you should double-check someone else's numbers, so at least we can find scum or be more confident with the results we have.

If Talilan lied, we ARE screwed, so why not double-check Talilan. I'd be sad if you double-checked me because it's a waste of time.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Just don't wait toooo long, remember we also need time to vote.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

Has bolding votes fallen out of fashion?

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

I think I'm confusing the votes with the Condorcets again. Never mind.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

41 = 3 votes

+

Vote [34, 5, 56, 41], [1-4, 6-13, 15-17, 19-22, 24-33, 35-38, 40, 42-50, 53-55, 57-68, 70-73, 75], [74, 14, 39, 23, 51, 18, 52, 37, 69]

Are these the votes we got so far?

And we're 7 players?

Who is not voting?

Thok, DGB, hewitt?

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

I'm bored.

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

"Whatever" vote 41??? OMG that is soooo scummy. That impression of not caring and indifference you're trying to give. I wonder. Would a scum play Mr. Indifferent if we have the right answer, or the wrong answer?

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

That hurt. : - (

[GoofballsAndBaloons]

You live in Chicago, and you moan about fake people? All of Los Angeles hates you. All the bags of salines, all the barrels of Botox, all the truckloads of collagen, every nip and tuck HATES you.

And this game is in LA, haha. This was not the game to complain about fake people.

Also, you are more fake than me. Re-read your posts.

SL, there are people lying. If we pick 41, and 41 turns out not "very good" then we will choose an alternative at random. No? It's better to get more information, like, is someone lying. Another consideration is that if you chose the numbers at random, then chances are that the scum is steering us towards a "NOT very good" but a random outcome that could equally be good, neutral, bad, or very bad. They'd have little control of the alternative. It's not a huge difference; that last choice is better spent checking for liars.