Yet Another Dance of the Title Fairy: Change Up

[Mina]

All right, normally I don't like suggesting unflattering titles...but TBM didn't have a problem with it, CooLDoG seems like he's okay with being insulted/mocked, and this is so, so perfect that I can't resist.

Nominate CooLDoG for "Wanker."

This works on three levels:

1) His sig, obsession with masturbation, and creepy porn thread spam.
2) ...um...do I need to explain this one?
3) "Wanker" is a term used by communities like Fandom Wank that mock drama, flame wars, and crazy/dumb/entitled people in fandom (and refers to the people being mocked). I've felt increasingly as though the battle over Speakeasy would fit right in on that site.

[Mina]

No, the period is just the convention of putting punctuation marks that aren't ! and ? inside quotation marks.

[Mina]

...

Nominate UberNinja for Loathsome, Pathetic, Disgusting Person Who Should Die Slowly and Painfully, and Whom Everyone Hates, and Who Smells Bad, and Who Also Is a Horrible Mafia Player and Cancer to this Site.

Alternately,

Nominate UberNinja for adsdsuihoagesufhapsidughpIUDEGHPAIUERWGHIuwrhpidshfdihGSDUHIupwgwHIUWHSDG.

.

Any takers?

(edit: I hope the joke is obvious, just because I feel mean otherwise.)

[Mina]

*fires a bullet into quadz's head*
*gets shot by TBM*

TBM wins!

[Mina]

No fair. ABUSE OF POWER! *reports*

[Mina]

You're more than welcome.

[Mina]

I don't get that feel either. To me, Chevre is like the innocent little kid who can take a punch and roll with it. He doesn't let anyone truly get him down (or at least he doesn't show it) despite the undeserved flak he gets. However, I do support the notion of nominating him for contributing all the lists/contests to MS.

What about

Survivor

?

That doesn't take into account his ranking obsession, but does his love of reality TV shows like Survivor, Big Brother, etc.

We can go with something like

Top of the Charts

if people think Pop Ten is more notable, but there must be a way to combine reality TV and lists/rankings in one title.

(One-Hit Wonder works, too, but it implies that Chevre has only one gimmick, or has a short shelf life.)

[Mina]

Sorry to be a killjoy, but to be honest, I much prefer Doctor Feelgood (which is clever, and actually references several of Matt's distinctive traits) to "Relax, I got this" (which I personally

hate

, because it's generic and feels like people are going, "Um...let's give Matt a title. What do I like about him? Well, he's so cool and good at Mafia...so let's have him say something cool and relaxed, even though it's a statement he's never actually said in his history on the site!") But maybe I'm just not getting the Frankie Goes to Hollywood reference, and if everyone else including Matt prefers "Relax, I got this," feel free to disregard my opinion.

ETA: Now Google tells me "Relax, I got this" is an actual meme, but I still don't really see the connection it has to MattP. That title can be tacked onto just about any random confident or relaxed player on this site (and is MattP even unusually relaxed as a Mafia player?)

[Mina]

I live to poison wells.

[Mina]

nth Buns of Steel

Edit: although I'd find the plural joke funnier if the phrase was something that wasn't supposed to be pluralized. Pity Hardasses was vetoed, because that was my favourite.

[Mina]

"HUGS ♥" is her thing, like GODDAMMIT is kdowns's thing.

"HUGS ♥" is Rach's thing like "except when I do/it does/etc" is my thing, except she says it more. Better comparison.

I'd prefer the title with the heart but meh. I dunno, despite UT's love for simplicity I think we can definitely find something better for Rach's title.That might just be me.

Hugs is literally a one word title that accurately and succinctly describes her personality on the forum. It really don't get "better" than that.

I agree with this. Sometimes, there's a

reason

something is obvious. IMO, the title needs the ♥, though--that's really RachMarie's signature emoticon.

Nth HUGS ♥

[Mina]

I'm pretty sure the only reason this hasn't been done over a year ago is because it's

too

obvious.

Nominate hitogoroshi for ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[Mina]

Plz don't spend 44 pages thinking "how can we make this better" and suggesting variants it owns you own nth it ty much love hito loves u too prob who knows let's make this like the frog title and not overthink it (which also was cool)

Nominate hito for "Shrugs like a whinnying pony that used to be a discussion mod."

(please no one second this one)

[Mina]

It's because you're now too indifferent to external recognition!

[Mina]

I like how hito now has the heaviest username in the board.

Now I can't unsee it.

[Mina]

I am not opposed to the idea of a title that references verbosity. However, if I wanted to have verbosity as part of my title, I'd just re-activate Mastin because I have the "Unabridged" under it. Is verbosity a part of me, undeniably. Is it something I'm comfortable being titled on, no, not by itself. Heck, even "Unabridged" had more than one layer, referencing my writing.

Nominate mastin2 for unabridged2.

[Mina]

I thought it was fine because of this:

Heck, even "Unabridged" had more than one layer, referencing my writing.

I also liked the callback to the account switch (which I think is another memorable part of mastin2's persona). But if mastin doesn't like it, then never mind.

[Mina]

Third "The Second Coming" for mastin2.

It doesn't reference the verbosity, but it's positive and works because of the WWMD thing, his resemblance to Jesus, Mastin's resurrection as mastin2, and the hype he receives. And it's actually funny, unlike milquetoast stuff like "Safe Behind His Walls."

I don't want this to come across as an attack on mastin, who often has insightful things to say. And certain people are being far harsher than they need to be. No one should feel pressured to accept an insulting title just to be the butt of someone else's joke. But "Tome of Knowledge" is just such a fawning, over-the-top title that it's only human nature to react badly to either the hubris in unironically suggesting it for yourself or the sycophancy in unironically suggesting it for someone else. People don't like arrogance.

Also, there's a trend on mafiascum (with fads like the Cult of UberNinja or the Flowchartians) that repeating over and over again that you're smart, good at Mafia, popular, etc., will get a large contingent of the site to take your word for it without questioning you. So no matter how useful you think mastin's MD threads are, shoving their usefulness down people's throats creates a backlash.

[Mina]

(Also the jesus title is better than that generic behind my walls thing, "stop nominating we have a title", is also stupid - if a better title comes along for anyone it's allowed to be discussed, it's not like mastin even has his title yet)

This.

Mina the arrogant part of Tome was purposeful.

I think that title satisfied a lot of criteria for Mastin. And sycophant, I am not.

I'm sorry. That flew over my head (and everyone else's, I think).

I find the Jesus title arrogant in a

funny

way--it pokes fun at mastin without being mean-spirited. Plus it works on several levels. But it's up to mastin at this point.

[Mina]

Actually, while I have everyone, TBM, would you mind getting rid of my old account's title?

I don't mind if this one gets one or not, there's just no use for that title to be on my old account if someone wants to use it.

If you're only saying this so someone else can use your title, then you might as well keep it. No one wants to usurp it now that the ArcAngel suggestion was killed.

[Mina]

I was thinking that pirate mollie could have a title based on her habit of deliberately mangling everyone's name in Mafia games with a funny nickname (e.g, "kit things"). She has other noteworthy qualities, but that one is a pretty distinctive mollie trait.

I can't think of anything clever for that (

Objectifying

, since she calls every one "____ thing"?), but does anyone have better ideas?

[Mina]

Objectifying sounds very negative, I wouldn't go with that, but I guess to show that she mangles peoples name her title can be a mangle of her own name, but idk what either.

But it's not intended to be negative at all. She's LITERALLY objectifying people. If anything, the problem with that title is that it only works on one level (unlike CooLDoG's "Wanker").

The most hilarious mangled mollie title I can come up with is

rat thing

. But, um, that's not exactly more positive. (I would find it funny if I was titled that, since it's obviously just based on her name and not an intentional insult, but I could see how mollie might be offended.)

[Mina]

Buttons, my pets were named Loathsome Abomination, Foul Odour, Stupid Face, and Go Run Into Traffic.

thingamajig is the only halfway decent mollie one so far.

The only problem with thingamajig is that it gives the impression that she's the thing, when in reality she's actually the...

Wait! Third time's the charm:

Thingmaker.

*gets shot*

[Mina]

That's five so barring any last second additions I'll run with

Thingmaker

for mollie once I'm home.

It might work better for mollie if

thingmaker

is lowercase, actually. But it's her choice.

[Mina]

I'm not sure whether to take that as a compliment, but I don't think anything I've posted in this thread has topped Wanker, yet.

Not really feeling any of the Jake or Sven titles (and the AP one, mostly because by my standards, he's a novice at the art of waffling), but I don't have any better suggestions.

[Mina]

Whatever happened to Tammy's title?

It seems like everyone agreed that it should be somehow related to Waffles, but then nothing came of it.

Nominate Tammy for Mrs. Waffles.

I think it best captures both her waffling nature and her eerily close relationship with her cat. ("Waffles' pet" is too cutesy for me.)

[Mina]

It's not

just

about being a cat lover, though. Waffles himself ascended to meme status during the popularity contest. That's leaving aside N's avatar bet, the hydra, and the running joke that the best way to get Tammy's attention in a conversation is just to randomly say, "WAFFLES!" (although the latter is sort of a niche thing). Her fondness for talking about Waffles has become a self-aware parody at this point.

[Mina]

*summons title fairy*

[Mina]

I still prefer Mrs. Waffles, but Crazy Waffle Lady is growing on me. (I think it'd work better as Crazy Waffle

s

Lady, though.) Lady Waffles is decent, but I think "Mrs. Waffles" is funnier because it sounds more like a crazy cat lady. Changing it to Wafflington ruins the joke, because then it's ONLY about the hydra.

I'd ask Tammy herself what she prefers, but...um...that might not be the best way to get a consensus.

[Mina]

The real cat's last name is something like Wafflebottoms, actually. The hydra was just like Iteration 17 of the name. But Waffles is what he's widely known as on the forums. Anyway, I think it's funnier and to the point when it's just Waffles.

[Mina]

That quote agrees with me. His name is Sir Henry Huffington Wafflebottoms, but has five zillion nicknames with the word "Waffles" in them, including Sir Wafflington, because she couldn't make up her mind while she was naming him. But everyone just calls him Waffles, INCLUDING Tammy. If she's Mrs. Wafflington or Mrs. Wafflebottoms,

then

it becomes a weird niche thing that isn't known to the site. Moreover, it dilutes the joke, because she doesn't wafflington in games; she waffles.

It also says something sad about my life that this is what I've been reduced to arguing about on the Internet.

[Mina]

This title discussion is definitely living up to Tammy's legacy.

[Mina]

also why does mina not have a title yet anyways

Because all the titles suggested for me are either terrible or just excuses to find new ways to call me short?

I still prefer Mrs. Waffles to Classic Waffles and Keep Calm and Waffle on. The other two feel more like random phrases with the word "Waffle" in them; moreover, the connection to Waffles the cat is lost. (But maybe I don't get the "Classic Waffles" reference.)

[Mina]

nominate kanyeknowsbest for "fast and fiurious"

did i ever mention tht i rly like this title?

I actually fell for this last night and didn't realize my mistake until now.

[Mina]

That reminds me of kaney more than N >_>

OMIGOD, YOUR AVATAR!!! <3

[Mina]

I like

Housing Problem

for ETL. No snappy puns, but it gets the job done.

[Mina]

Mina ->

Mafia Scum

{Not great, but let's spitball some ideas}

N already had this idea. Please don't remind him.

Also, I'm a butterfly because I set buildings on fire and no one suspects me afterwards, not because I particularly look like one.

[Mina]

ballooN

?

here N spirit

maybe.

This concept has potential (although any N pun is kind of painful).

[Mina]

Maybe I'd like this title if I actually understood why it's a username pun.

[Mina]

Prodding TBM.

(I know his work schedule is grueling, but it's been a really long time since any title was given out or weighed in on by the Title Fairy, even though multiple titles have got the required support needed in the past few months. Could you catch up on this thread?)